Chinese character in line a poem by me

I have no idea if I want to blog all the bad stuff in life. It is not the time. All I will do is use the F word.

So I will write something that is from a good part of me.


I do not know what to say.
It is kind of early.
Not because it does not mean anything.
and not because I do not feel anything.
I do not want to wake up someday and realize that it is gone.
I keep making myself forget you.
I am so afraid that I'll just bother you.
Mostly because all I do is linger around you.
I do not mean to.
I don't get to keep anything.
It has always been taken from me.
Plus I can see the rarity of what I found.
It is not on sale.
And no one has had a chance to see it yet.
I'm one person and I'm so broken and paranoid that even if you did not run away,
I'd wear you down with time.
Like a wind up toy given that runs out of time from wear and tare and someone growing out of it.
I don't mean to sound like I need to be patronized or bandaged.
This is not your fault or your job.
If you could see all the chips in the glass and all the glitter on the ground, then
you probably would not think about how pathetic that this sounds.
I just almost met you.
and I'm sorry that I did not meet you before.
Maybe you could have seen me all brand new.
You're shiny and you feel perfectly around all my cracks and scars.
You don't bother me and you don't hurt me.
You seem to interest me.
and I think that if you ever wanted to , with the way that I already feel, you could break me in so many pieces that I'd never be on a shelf again.