Elite x ray visionary conversation

This is not one of my stories.
I need a good lawyer.
Strange as life is -
It just got a little more bizarre.

I went to my account the other day.
Walmart claims to have reissued
my Walmart master card.
Why is that odd?
Well for starters-
I never requested Walmart to cancel the card that I already have now.
I would say it is over the miscalculation on their end.
Or whoever hacked my account.
But
My balance has only maxed out.
The stolen money on my card has not been put back.
They out of no where just reissue my card.
I have not received a new card yet in the mail.

I don't like the way this looks.
I reported it to the irs and the FBI.
With wiki leaks-
I have already reported the money loss.

I just want my life back.
I want my freedom and my life back.
This is a headache to put up with.

New issue
I have a lock on my mail box that is outside my house.
I assumed that I would lock it.
The key that worked before
The key that came with my house
No longer works
Because someone changed it.
Now I have to deal with the cops.
Not only that-
My phone has a selective process-
When I want to report anything to wiki leaks now-
It doesn't work.
I think my phone has been hacked too.
Lawsuit city no limitations.
I'm upset.
The one shred of hope-
I'm not locked out of my mail box.
But I think now it is safe to say this is a
little more than a random oddity.
It's not in my head anymore.
Someone is causing me problems.

Oh and ssi pays early in march because
The 3rd falls on a Saturday.

I hope this is not like the first of December 2017.
I did report that.

The water company has been over charging me.
I have proof.

I'm going to move when I get my life back.

Abraham Lincoln

Someone compared me to a president that was assignated.
Because I am not interested in being abused
And allowing it just so I don't come off racist.

What I choose
Has nothing to do with the loss of love
Or the abandonment that I feel.

People kill everything around me because they like to make sure their pockets are filled.

I'm alone.

They really did not hear a damn thing I said.

Apparently they need a lawyer to explain it.

What am I speaking French?

I am insulted and abused.

I did not sleep much again.

Walmart claims that they sent me a new Walmart master card 💳

Interesting
Because
I have never received it yet.
I also did not re- order a new card.

My balance does not indicate that they gave me back my loss from
Their miscalculation,

I'm upset.
It's a dwd.tm thing

I'm not pregnant.
I think Britney is pregnant.
She is a trashy loser.
I could care less about her life.

But I am not pregnant.

If you asked, then you already know the answer

Held down
By your own mistake you enjoy watching me
Suffer.
Suffocate and beg.
I want to breathe.
Me receiving my life back
Should not bother you.
You don't want to lose me?
I would think that is your dying wish.
Because all you do
And all you caused is targeting me
And ripping me in two.
Holding me down
Neglecting me
Cheating on me
Is actually going to be the reason
that I finally leave.
And I will never look back.
You are less likely to understand.
Which is why you will never know.


I keep my feelings on shelves.
They are seldom touched and hardly cared for.
Which is why my feelings are covered in dust.
No one gets paid to be my maid.
So no one cares how neglected I am.

No to fish gills but yes to exotic Dark skin

I'm alone and up to late in these hours .
The day is Wednesday.
The house looks neglected again.
I begged for a haven.
I ran away.
I found you.
Now I drift away to the thought of you
 so that for a moment I'm happy again.
I worry they will take you away.
I worry you will be hurt.
More than anything I am afraid that
 I will screw this up.
I am good at that.


Memories and lies
I keep telling myself all the things
I can't accept
Because if I don't lie to myself now
Then I will never be able to deal with the day you leave.
I'm good at making up fiction in my mind and pushing you away.
You are amazing and impossible to forget.
The only truth I can't shake
Is how much I love you.


Instead
I will not lie to you.
Instead I will let you in.
I don't normally do that.
Instead of someone else-
I will pick you.
No one else is here.
Even if they were-
I already know
They could never replace you
And nothing could make me
Stop loving you.
I have no secret mo

They lie. I have had enough of this

I heard that they want to brainwash me .
I'm not interested in being brainwashed.
No need-
My attention span is already like a cheap spinning toy.

I want the truth and nothing but.

I am embarrassed for all the celebrities who have had their images used by them.
Only to rip up my life.

They threaten to make my death look like a self inflicted suicide.

I don't have plans to kill my self.

They are too much sometimes.

Not just to laugh at but to enrage me.

I don't kill people.

But I want a lawyer.

It is not okay- what they did.

It never will be.

I'm alone at home.
Someone made a comment about my utilities.
I'm not sure y?

The aep / pso has been upping my bill for months.

They lie and they want a lawsuit too.

Those celebrities are live when they pull that crap.

Inspired poetry by the mind of an insane human man

Zero indifference
By Jessica singleton

Pain turns into pleasure
Once you have felt it enough
To require it.
Like an addiction
Label me with individuals
We all start looking the same
Once the box hair color washes in
But after this long
I have walked away to understand
That nothing in this life will lead me back to you.
I can't find you anywhere inside of anyone
I'm alone at a table by myself.
I'm going through magazines and I am thinking about you.
You are something to me
And you are everything I could ever want and respect

Back sided coincidence
By Jessica singleton

I flip the world over
I watch it spin and I keep reading all
Names of places that I can only look at
None of the place slots look like more than a weekend
Vacation to me
My finances are not the problem.
The world is just that
But you are everything and the only thing that really matters
Besides as soon as I got to wherever there is
I would just want to come back to you.
I'm tired tonight.
I wish you were holding me inside your arms.
Because I need comfort and I need to feel loved.

poems about love and regret

Duch Whiskey 🥃
Black coffee tastes good
But whiskey taste better off your lips
I like it when you smile
But I love the way you breathe into my neck
When you release yourself into me
I can't get enough of you
If you only knew how much
I dream about you
I could never have what it would take
To tell you how I feel.
So I will write it on a piece of paper.
I will fold my feelings in two
And I will leave them here for you.
That way by the time you find them.
I will have walked away and I will not have
To know if you don't feel the same.
I can keep in my fantasies a little longer.


Take it in
The doors here lock from both sides
of  our eyes.
It can work both ways.
I don't want to shut you out
But I can't take this in
Not like this
I think we take turns
Locking each other out.
I'm only sorry it took this long to let you in


Sacramento

she is a waitress.
She is the after hours crowd for him
Just found in the nights like this.
Because the reason he is drinking coffee at 11 pm
Has nothing to do with his thirst
He kept a black book that turned into a belt.
What he lost over his lack of control
Haunts his memories and gives him the nerves
To make small talk with strangers
He will do anything to not feel the regret


Box set
I'm watching the dial tonight
My after hours crowd is kicking in
I'm drunk and consumed with regret
Can I just not feel like this
Not all the time
I just need a night off
Cause laughter is the regret in the alone hours
And tomorrow will be worse then today
I heard the weather man at 2 am
He knows nothing about small talk
He only pisses me off
I flipped off the box set
And I spent my night in a book.
Everyone wants a piece of my time
They take more of me which is
They are taking my life away
And they leave me alone in a staticky state
Where all I want to do is
release my self from their corner.
I shut the door and I block them out


Meghan

If you only knew all the things
I can remember when I meet someone new.
You would assume that you had invited me over to dinner
And mom- you would be introduced to her.
It's funny how she would only be a visitor and not a guest.
She is a lot of hers and not one is right for me
I only think about family because now I feel unwelcome at my own table
I'm not a boy anymore
I almost wish I was
Because I need you to hug me and say that it's going to be alright.
Someday I will meet someone and I know it will finally feel right
But I don't understand why I can't forget all the times it
It hurt like this.

1950's truck
Freedom is the wind from the open road.
Time is a hitchhiker from south of no where
God all time I spared
Every no where left shot glasses and postcards
On my night stand
None of that accounts for what I gave up

Love me and don't change me.
Tell me it is okay.
Cause you know we aren't going to leave what we have found here.
You like the way I hold you and I love the way you laugh
We will get past this.
We always do
And I do love you

For Valentines Day

I am going to post my Valentines blog early about four days early.
In case I forget.
I'm bad with memory but great with not letting anything go.

I'm a fan of greeting cards and stationary.
I wish my phone would let me post some great vintage prints.

Anyway

I don't have any good Valentines Day memories.
I have some amazing Halloween memories though.

But no one needs to hear about that.

I do have a lot of stories that I have written about Valentines Day.

I like chocolate and hearts and
I love things that fly .

So Valentines Day is actually amazing on its own.

Cupid
Angel
Chocolate
Stationary
Heart ❤️
And
Glitter.
Saints
Lovers kept apart

Good love song choice for Valentines Day
1. Love Song For A Vampire
2. Love you to death
3. As the world falls down
4. Enjoy the silence
5. All of my love
6. I knew I loved you before I met you
7. Everything I do- I do it for you


Color choice
Black
Ruby
Silk
Pearl
Amethyst

Movie choice
Legend
A walk to remember
Dracula untold

----/

Petals
By
Jessica Singleton

This piece of me is seasonal.
If you are not careful
I will fall apart and be left to wither on the ground.
I look strong  and completely armored
Against the world with a dress made from Cupid's bow
Those silver studs are not weapons.
It is every part of me where I broke apart
and I tried to put myself back together.
I'm sorry if I will push you away out of fear.
Until you finally break in two.

Love
By Jessica Singleton

You walk around me
I'm surprised
I have never had what it  took before now.
As much as I have seen you around.
As much as you cross my mind.
But I don't acknowledge you at all,
I guess you feel invisible when I am locked
Inside my own world.
You never got a chance to know me at all.
I don't let myself know that I love you.
That way if this card never finds your attention
I will not break apart.
For the rest of my life
I doubt I will ever forget you.
Let it rain

Emerald Velvet

I do not know how to talk anymore.
I mean to say  , even though I can speak.
I don't feel like people can understand me.

With other matters-
I feel like no one cares.
I have gotten to the point that I'm afraid to talk at all.

I'm devastated.
I just sit here and I feel pathetic.
Like some emo loser .
I know I am not looking for a reason to be looked at.
This actually happened,
So naturally anyone would be upset or irrational in behavior.

I saw a picture today.
It was great.
Not a movie .
An actual picture.
It effected me.
I am not moved very easily.
My reaction to anything is five minutes off.
Even then I don't care.
Someone has effected me.

I'm not used to this.

I am mostly
97 % upset about my situation.
I don't think I can express how it feels.

Kadupul by Jessica Singleton to dwd

Kadupul

Something so rare should not end so suddenly after its birth.
But the odds don't favor a creation born from thorns.
I'm sorry if I hurt you but I am made from darkness and thorns,
I've been crucified by my own blood and time.
You were never supposed to exist.
Something so beautiful should never come from
The worst part of a tragedy.
They will awaken the sun for you.
And they will use me to do it.
I have become your death.
I can't find the right to claim you in my heart.
I feel like I have destroyed everything that you deserve.
You were my match in that sense.
You in turn are my sunlight.
They could never understand.
I have gone out of my way to avenge my life and my right.
The idea of you finally being happy 
breaks my heart more than your 
abuse and neglect.
I can't stand the idea of losing you.
I don't feel like you were ever mine.
When I force myself to fight for myself
I realize that to do that I have to knock you down.
I don't have what it takes to harm you.
I've never hated myself more than when I fight with you.
I'm sorry Kadupul.

Japanese cherry blossom
That sense that is never spoken of this time of year.
To love anyone else is the other part of your soul.
You are delicate and you could be folded into a secret.
No one knows how I feel.
Why should they?
It's not a sense they are accustomed to.

Don't lie

Steeple front
Three dimensional puzzle
Stacked intentions
Pardon my expression
But your pieces only
House a deck of gambled wrongs
It's on borrowed time and sugar pills
The window to your soul is a fallen choir boy
And sadly you don't have the convictions to
Right this wrong.
I'm watching the static box
Men in suits and ties are telling me what to think
As they explain the climate change
Apparently they think that is how my mind works
I'm confused why my opinion matters with this anyway
Because I don't have anything to do with it.
It's okay to vote
Be heard
Make a change
But honestly
All this insanity
Only makes more white noise inside of my head
I am screaming on the inside.
I feel like I am being condemned for other people's opinions



Him to
I could lean into you and I could tell you
how intriguing and amazing you are
But you can't understand common sense
And my opinion doesn't exist to you anymore.


Great for tracking

It has a number.
So it's bones rattle like a snake
There is no way of covering up your ghost
And your skeletons are all over the floor of your consciousness
I'm getting justice and redemption now
You'll never rip my life in two again

Piano bench

He sits in dimmed lights.
He watches the fingers dance
And he drifts into his own fantasies.
It's late where the bench sits.
Cause everyone needs this after
everything they've been through.
And no one knows how to start over.
I don't play.
I never knew how to understand.
Not like everyone else.
So I sit in the back of the room
And I take notes while I drink.
Every line is in symbolic rhythm.
Hidden but it translates into
 every language on earth.
Everyone knows this song.
It haunts when you think of why you love it.
But at this hour-
You just don't talk about anything.


Pictures and expressions

I have a picture of my grandmother.
That is real.
It displays a memory from long ago.
But I don't have an expression
when I talk about it.
The reason is that the memory
is not what they want to know.
They need to enjoy my pain.
They want to see me cry so they
know that they succeeded in
ripping up all my memories.


Finding a new friend

Hopefully it will not hurt.
That makes me feel pathetic.
I've never been good at
communicating with other people.
When I half way succeed
Then I realize that the other person
Is only something that I want to run from.
What is worse?
When I do not realize that I should run until
I fall in love with them.
By the time I wake up it hurts
so bad that I can hardly take off.